I'm A Vampire    I'm Not Dead
by Lastelle
Summary: Lissa, Dimitri, Stevie Ray, Damien, Erin and Shawnee think that Rose is dead . . . and they killed her! Problem: Rose is still alive. Who do they turn to for help? Jace, Clary, Alec and Isabelle! This is Rated T, not M! Pre-Zoe, Post-COG, no place in VA.


Lissa, Stevie Ray, Damien, Erin, Shawnee and Dimitri are framed for killing Rose. The thing is, she's still alive! I got this idea from BtVS, the episode where they think Willow is dead. This is my first fanfic, so it's probably terrible, but if you (readers if anyone reads this) give me constructive critisism, I will try to do better on the next chapter! I hope you enjoy this chapter!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own House of Night, Vampire Academy or Mortal Instruments. Don't take me wrong, I wish I did, but I don't. If I did, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction.

* * *

Rose pulled on her coat as she looked outside. It was raining. Still. It had been raining all night, and most of the day. Sometimes Rose wished that she could just make all this crappy rain just _stop_.

"Hey," a voice said from behind Rose.

Rose turned to see Dimitri. He was the cool guy at the New York Vampire House. She was surprised he had noticed her, "Hey," she said. Dimitri was definitely one of the hotter vamps at NYVH. Of course, he had a girlfriend. Aphrodite. She was the reining Bitch of the Year, and had been for the last four years. NYVH was like a high school, only it started when vamps were in grade five, and ended when they were in grade twelve. Dimitri was three years older than Rose, and was in grade twelve, but being a vampire, he hadn't aged in a few years, so he looked like he was seventeen.

"You excited?" Dimitri asked. It wasn't hard to guess what he was talking about. There was going to be a Shadowhunter presentation that morning.

"Yeah," Rose said. Most Shadowhunters who had to come out to the NYVH were insulted at having to come to talk to a group of to-be vampires about the rules, but this year, _the_ Jace Lightwood and _the_ Clarissa Fray, the famous Shadowhunter couple who saved the world a couple of years ago, were coming to talk to them. Supposedly, they were even bringing along Simon Lewis, the first Daylighter vampire in living memory, and for a vampire, that's a while.

"Me too," Dimitri said, "I mean, Jace Lightwood and Clary Fray are living legends, and Simon Lewis is the first Daylighter in forever."

"Thanks for the history lesson, professor," Rose said sarcastically, "I remember it for the quiz."

"Hey!" a girl's voice said from behind them. Both Rose and Dimitri turned to see Aphrodite standing there, "Dimitri! What are you doing here? It's so damn _dull_."

"Just waiting out the rain with Rose," Dimitri said.

Aphrodite turned to see Rose as if for the first time, "Oh, well, you'll be waiting a long time, isn't there like a permanent rain cloud right above her? Come on, let's go somewhere more _fun_."

The way she put stress on the word 'fun', Rose could tell that her idea of fun wasn't a party with all her friends. Rose looked outside again. The rain was letting off a little, so she decided to make her exit, "See you!" she said to Dimitri, gave Aphrodite a look that said 'bitch' and went out into the rain. She headed over to the girls' dorm, hoping that wasn't where Aphrodite was going to have her 'fun'.

* * *

When she reached her room, she found Lissa, Stevie Ray, Erin and Shawnee were waiting for her. The only part of their group who wasn't there was Damien, but he was a guy, and even though he was gay, he still wasn't allowed into the girls' dorm.

"What's up?" Rose asked.

"We're going over to the boys' dorm to see Damien," Erin said.

"It'll be fun," Shawnee insisted. Erin and Shawnee looked nothing alike. Erin had white skin and blond hair, whereas Shawnee had mocha skin and black hair. The two of them were roommates, and ever since the first day of school, they had been more like twins than best friends, in fact, that's what the group called them. The Twins.

"Yeah, sure" Rose said sarcastically, "It's hard enough to sneak Damien up here, it'll be near impossible to get all of us in there."

"_Nearly_ impossible," Lissa said, "But not completely, you see, there's a vine growing up the side of the wall next to Damien's window. We can climb it easily."

Rose looked at them all disbelievingly. She couldn't believe that they were suggesting what they were suggesting, and yet, a few minutes later, they were standing next to the boys' dorm. Damien was half-hanging out an open window.

"Okay!" he stage whispered, "Come on up!"

Lissa was the first to go up, followed by Stevie Ray, and then Erin, who was closely followed by Shawnee. This left Rose at the bottom. She bent her legs, braced herself, and jumped as high as she could. She easily caught one of the stronger parts of the vine, and started to climb. Lissa was right, Rose thought, this is easy. She reached the window, to find that the lights had been turned off. She eased herself over the window and hit the floor softly.

Suddenly, the lights flew on, and everyone yelled "SURPRISE!"

"What?" Rose said, blinking as her eyes adjusted to the light.

"Did you really think we'd forget your birthday?" Stevie Ray asked with her soft twang.

Rose laughed. Someone handed her a drink. She took a sip, fruit punch. They talked, laughed, had fun, everyone gave Rose presents. Rose remembered her birthdays before becoming a vampire. Her mother would buy a cake from the store, and get her fifty dollars. Not that the annual fifty dollars didn't help her out every once in a while, but it would have been nice if her mom had at least put a little effort into it. Maybe a gift card? Rose shook her head. No. She wasn't going to think of that today. She was just going to have fun.

* * *

"So," the vampire on the stage said, "I hope you all realize how immense an honour it is to have three such living legends visit our school. Without further ado, I give you, Shadowhunters Jonathan Lightwood and Clarissa Fairchild, and Daylighter Vampire, Simon Lewis."

Everyone applauded as they waited expectantly for the trio they had all been waiting for to step onto the stage. Someone pushed a boy of about seventeen onto the stage. The boy had dark eyes and brown hair. He was attractive enough, but not_ Dimitri hot_.

"What the hell was that for?" the boy demanded. Everyone could hear him.

"Talk to them, vampire," another voice said from offstage, "They're your own kind."

"I don't talk with people," the boy snapped, "Especially not vampires."

"Nobody cares that you're an antisocial loser," the voice from offstage drawled, "Just think of them all being naked."

"What?" a girl's voice exclaimed. It was also from offstage.

"It's what I'd do if I had stage fright," the male voice from offstage said.

The boy stood onstage and looked offstage at them. He was paler than most humans, and Damien figured that this was Simon Lewis. If that was true, then the boy's voice was the voice of Jace Lightwood, and the girl's voice came from Clary Fairchild.

"Besides," Jace continued, "He's seventeen. Isn't that what all seventeen-year-old boys do anyways?"

"Number one he's nineteen, he just hasn't aged because he's a vampire," Clary snapped, "and number two, you were a seventeen-year-old boy not so long ago, why don't you just say what seventeen-year-old guys are like?"

"Well I wasn't exactly a _normal_ seventeen-year-old guy, was I?" Jace asked, "You didn't fail to point that out a whole crapload of times."

"Jesus!" Clary exclaimed.

"No, just part angel," Jace said.

Simon turned to the crowd of silent vampires and whispered, "We're all wearing small microphones, so everyone can hear us talk. Let's see how long it takes for them to figure it out."

"You just can't let that go, can you?" Clary asked, "Ooh, I'm Jace Lightwood, and I'm so special because I'm an experiment gone wrong!"

"What are you, then?" Jace demanded, "An accident? A problem? Something to be dealt with?"

"Look," Clary snapped, "I'm sorry if you thought that the guy who raised you was some great dude, but the guy I met? Not exactly the guy I'd want in charge of the world, and you used to agree with me until we defeated him and then you got all second guess-y."

"I'm not second guessing," Jace insisted, "I don't regret stopping Valentine, I just think that maybe you didn't really know him."

"Well maybe you didn't either," Clary said softly, "That guy who raised you might have loved you, but he was crazy, so even if he did, you didn't really rank very high on what he should bother with," she paused, "And I'm sorry. That thing about the experiment gone wrong was uncalled for."

"Well, I wasn't exactly Mr. Courteous either," Jace said.

Damien heard Jace and Clary both move, then they muttered something, but it was muffled, like their microphones had a hand over them, and then it sounded like they had started to make out. Damien thought about what Jace might look like. He seemed kind of arrogant, and that normally meant that he was really cute. Damien shook his head. No, Shadowhunters never swung that way, it was like some kind of code with them. Thou shalt not kill Downworlders unless they have harmed a mundane. Thou shalt not associate with Downworlders. Thou shalt not be gay.

"NO!" Simon shouted, "Turn it off! Turn it off! My ears! My eyes!"

There was a startled sound coming from Jace and Clary, and then Clary marched onstage. She had red hair that looked like fire and her eyes blazed as she glared at Simon, "Simon!" she yelled, "I'm going to _kill_ you! And this time, you won't come back!" She turned to notice the crowd of vampires who were all trying to hold in their laughter. She gave Simon a glare that said 'I'll get you for this' and then called to Jace, "Stop making your hair cool, and get out here!" What Damien was sure she wanted to say was "Because there's no way in hell I'm facing this alone because they're laughing at you too."

Jace stepped out onto the stage and Damien nearly fainted. He was just as cute as Damien had thought he'd be. No, cross that, Jace was _hot_. He looked just like an angel who had lost his wings. He had blond hair and golden eyes, and a face that was a sculptor's dream.

"Hello," Jace called to the vampires, "Well, I'm _Jace_ Lightwood," he put just enough emphasis on 'Jace' that Damien could tell that he hated being called Jonathan, "This is Clary Fairchild," he gestured to Clary, "And that's Simon. So, we're here to tell you all that you _can't_ kill mundanes because we'd have to come and kill you. But they come here every year to say the same thing, so we're going to start off with questions. Which we might answer."

The very first question was, "What have you done the last two years?"

"Well," Jace said. Damien could tell he liked to hear himself talk, "we've done a lot of this, we met some important Shadowhunters and Downworlders," he started listing off people that Damien knew only from text books.

Clary finally just exclaimed, "Jesus, Jace!"

"No," Jace said, "We _didn't_ meet him."

"Okay," Simon said, after a pause, "You get the idea, any other questions?"

Damien raised his hand.

"You in the back with the . . ." Simon obviously couldn't think of anything to use to describe Damien, "Dark hair," he finished lamely.

"How did you become a Daylighter?" a boy asked from behind Damien. Damien turned. This boy had black hair and blue eyes. Damien recognized him instantly. It was Erik Night. After Dimitri, Erik was the resident hottie at the NYVH.

Jace said instantly, "Sorry, we're not allowed to talk about that. Also, we don't exactly know. Anyways, we can't say."

Damien blinked. Obviously, Jace had something to do with Simon becoming a Daylighter.

The rest of the Q and A period went pretty normal, well, as normal as it can be with a bunch of girls swooning over Jace and a few guys too. Damien made a mental note of who they were. When Clary finally said, "We're running out of time, so last question," Damien was pretty bored about hearing how Jace had killed this demon or how Clary had almost been killed by that demon. The most interesting story was about Simon getting turned into a rat when he was human, and then consuming vampire blood, and then turning into a vampire.

The vampire who had introduced them came out again and said, "Now, everyone go on back to your classes, Vasilissa Dragomir, Stevie Ray Johnson, Damien Maslin, Erin Bates, Shawnee Cole and Dimitri Belikov, please make your way to Headmistress Kirova's office immediately."

Damien looked at Lissa, Stevie Ray, Erin, Shawnee and Rose. Why hadn't they called Rose down – she was the one who normally got into trouble – and why did they want the rest of them?

"I'll meet you later," Rose said, and went off to her next class – Vamp Culture.

Damien turned to the others as everyone left the hall except for him, Lissa, Stevie Ray, Erin, Shawnee and Dimitri. Damien saw that Aphrodite was saying how she hoped that they would be able to see each other at lunch – probably to make out.

"So," Damien said, "I guess we'd better go and see what Headmistress Kirova wants."

"Creepy old bat probably just wants to tell us we're fucking idiots, and we should stop eating candy 'cause it rots our teeth," Erin said.

"You're right, Twin," Shawnee agreed, "I say she's the original hag from hell and Aphrodite and her lot are just the groupies."

Damien shook his head and lead the way to Kirova's office.

* * *

Rose sighed, she hadn't been able to see her friends at all that afternoon, and now she had a crapload of homework to do. She opened up the door to the dorm room she shared with Lissa to find that everyone was there. Even Damien, who was crying on the edge of her bed.

Rose looked at all of them, who all looked like they had been crying, and now looked shocked and a little scared at seeing her there. Lissa was the first to recover, and she ran at Rose and hugged her hard.

"Rose!" she yelled, obviously ecstatic about something.

"That's my name," Rose said, clueless. Lissa stepped back and everyone else ran at Rose and hugged her.

"You're alive!" Stevie Ray yelled, her soft twang was now rough from sobbing.

"Hey," Rose said, "You all didn't happen to do a bunch of drugs, did you?"

Damien said, "I couldn't believe it, I mean, we'd seen you just a few seconds ago, and then Kirova said that you were . . ." he choked up and couldn't continue.

"What did that evil hag say?" Rose demanded. What had Kirova said to make her friends so upset? Whatever it was, she was going to pay for it.

"She said you were dead," Lissa whispered.

That stopped Rose in her tracks, "What?"

"She said that she had seen you die," Erin said.

Shawnee continued, "And that we'd killed you."

* * *

Please review and answer any and all of my questions:

Did I get the characters right? Is Jace sarcastic enough? Is the dialogue all really bad? Is the Jace/Clary fight really the most horrible piece of dialogue anyones ever read? Did I add enough 'Jesus!' jokes? Are the 'Jesus!' jokes that are in here funny? Did I make everyone sad enough at Rose's death? Should they have been more sad? These are the questions that keep me up at night. Or at 8:17 AM, which is the time it is now - on a Saturday. I know, I have no life.

Please review and give me answers! Also, if you recognize the BtVS reference in here - YAY!


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